I'm gonna have a badass scar
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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