He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
