sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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