Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize