Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
