My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
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i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
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Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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