we made out on top of his cat.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
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You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
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Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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