Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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