fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
