i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
