he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
