Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
