Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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