Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
