drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize