out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
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