is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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