I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
