By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
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I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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