just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
A bitchslap is in order.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
