I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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