At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the day after is always just damage control
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
