she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
last night I used snow as a chaser
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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