I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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