left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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