Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
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