I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize