playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
