Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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