So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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