she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
