Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
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