i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize