Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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