Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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