absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis