I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize