are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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