K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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