youre lurking in front of me
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
