I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
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Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
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I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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