I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
