therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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