David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
