What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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