He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize