This girl is more easily done than said...
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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