omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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