but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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