He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
