I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
