we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Found the puke drawer
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize
