I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize